Know your Mountain Neighbor

By Cam Burns

The Je•thro•sex•ual

Applies to males. Any age. Wears lumberjack-style clothing, lives in a rustic cabin, likes nature, has four cats, collects antique first editions of classic literature and recites a lot of Coleridge and Wordsworth. Well-respected in the community, but no one knows why. Often quoted in the paper on enviro issues — again, no one knows why. Inadvertently touches your thigh in the checkout line at the market. Does a really strange movement with his hips when he arrives at a group of people. Believes a dirty sock worn around the neck will cure a sore throat. Is a licensed realtor.